BOOB TALK
i went to this self discovery course about 15 years ago.
what i learnt was
not to house-sit a house with an old dog.
how relative things are
my headaches weren't normal and no, i wasn't going to try and not take a headache pill because somebody thinks its in your head. seriously, what kind of migraine did you have to start off with, if sitting meditating for 10 minutes helps.
and then i realized how differently i thought. i don't stay in the parameters of normality.
we were called up to walk through a door in the wall.
it was stupid, there was no door. people got up and attempted.
seriously, they attempted getting through an imaginary door and the answer, duh, was "i can't".
she asked me and i went up and i said, "there is no door".
she said imagine there is one. i was hoping she would say that, so i said
so just imagine?
and i outlined this imaginary door.
is this it?
everybody had been holding the imaginary handle.
yes.
and you want me to just open it?
yes.
okay, do you see this imaginary door here? i point next to her imaginary door to outline my imaginary door.
it goes into the same imaginary room, but my imaginary door has a handle that works.
so you go through this one and open your imaginary door from inside.
quite obviously, your imaginary door's handle didn't work.
her lesson was you don't keep knocking your head against a brick wall.
my solution was, i can use my imagination if you can use yours. i don't have to play your game your way.
better still, if you drive at me in a tank, i'm not going to pick up a scooter and try outrun you or ride towards you. there is another way that i just haven't seen yet and i will find it.
it's amazing the lengths you go to when you start wondering if you heard right?
often lies are more convincing than the truth.
yes. you want to hear the conversation again.
an so i devised "boob talk".
instructions:
using a blackberry
turn off network contact so that no embarrassing calls or vibrations can come through during a conversation.
stick a piece of prestik on the flashing light
press record and leave it on all day.
i had a "boob talk" bra, that comfortably held it all day.
you never know when the next threat or lie will come up.
it records in hours so if nothing has happened in 1 hour. take it out and delete.
my phone could record for 8 hours.
keep another phone with you to act as your phone for people to see.
even when friends know you are doing this, they must know that you are not interested in them. you are only using this for one reason.
go home daily to delete unnecessary records.
when did i start?
how do they know they are recorded?
"its illegal" they may shout!
"its my property, my words" i say.
its their words they said quite freely, merely to deny later.
so they said it privately?
they didn't tell me to not tell anyone.
you can subpoena the recordings, if i have them.
you can subpoena them and other people can hear them.
and you may need to go through every recording to hear one statement.
there is no law against recording yourself.
the is no law recording a conversation without the others permission.
its your notes.
until somebody, other than you, hears the recording, there is not necessarily a conversation where you can hear the other person.
the other person can't force you to give it to them. its your property.
they can subpoena it, in which case its in a court for an entire courtroom to hear.
this is my solution
two:
5.13 he told me...
6.25 he said...
6.28 i said...
until they subpoena it.
the two lawyers in the hearing comment. "its illegal to record someone without their permission."
"OMG really?" i say surprised.
that is why there a two lawyers in the room for a simple hearing.
because i am dumb enough to let them hear it?
or smart enough to let them know it?
who in their right mind wants a court to hear an ominous threat from yourself.
firstly, don't say something you don't want others to hear. if i'm not your friend or counselor, i'm sure as hell not keeping your secret.
is this a threat? only if you want to make it one.
all i can say is "Duh. what were you thinking? clearly desperation makes you stupid."
